An Implosion There is silence, then I am no more, fragments of me Float in the body, is that why the heart hurts, the mind is Itchy, and the stomach is so full without lunch? Tell me dear world, where do I go to weep, to shout, to hurt Would you allow me to hurt at all? My revenge plan 1: silence. Stone cold noiselessness Revenge plan 2: shout at a brick wall, let the words lose meaning Revenge plan 3: to smile, and say you don’t matter Revenge plan 4: I want to slap you and stab you in the neck Revenge plan 5: I will fantasize about stabbing you Revenge plan 6: I weep, alone, into my pillow Revenge plan 7: take the allergy medicines to fall asleep Revenge plan 8: we’ll try mindfulness meditation to let it go Revenge plan 9: rationalize and empathize till you become him Revenge plan 10: maybe let’s give up on revenge Can we please be friends again? Day 97: I stab you in my dream I wake up smiling. The world is okay, I guess.
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Four puppies and a cat away My horror dreams are about Piercings in my body being occupied by maggots Like my dream home being slowly chewed By termites who show more resilience Than the puppy who laughs and jumps Despite a punctured chest And a hollowed underarm Is this the fear? Being empty Or being full And slowly chiseled away By the parasites of life The anxiety bug that takes over my day The carved out outline of our relationship With no words left, no care to share The therapist is still a week too far The vet will be wet, he needs a car It is raining in our home town My tears flood the house The maggots are winning Then tomorrow you'll be back I laugh and jump At your sight.
Is 10 AM a good time to be tired? You tell me, if 10 PM the previous day Was the right time for a sleeping Black and brown baby doggy To be run over by a car And if 7 30 AM was a good time For yoga, 8 30 AM for a bath, 9 AM to kiss your cat goodbye And 9 30 AM to see a the lifeless body Of a joyful puppy who was only now Starting to become friends with you. Is 10 AM a good time to be tired? Is 10 PM a good time to sleep When you have been driving the car since 6 AM in the morning, after all it is the wedding Of the employer’s daughter and there is Shagun to be gotten and mithai to be sent But the mithai is not for you to eat And the AC car, even though empty, Is not for you to sleep And how will you sleep tonight After the death of a little puppy That you wish you had seen. Why is 10 AM is a good time to be tired But 10 PM not a good time to sleep?
Men tell me not to be afraid of them But they stare at me when I'm at the store To buy dahi, my face cold and eyes red In anger and fear, always puzzled about how they'll react If I stare back at them; Men tell me not to be afraid of them As they make my experience of violence in a consensual encounter A cold hearted rational debate About objectivity and false rape cases They celebrate their win as I weep at home; Men tell me not to be afraid of them But I look left and right in dark alleys and walk with hastened steps My worst nightmare is three guys on a bike Even two, and when I go out I want to be ugly But men tell me to be beautiful And they tell me not to be afraid of them.
Kya tumhe semi-cooked pyaar hua hai? It all started with Pabs Hum bole – mujhe tumse behad mohabbat hai Kya tumhe bhi kabhi pyaar hua hai? Mujhe doubt hota hai Tumhe sirf mujhse hee pyaar hai Wo bhi semi-cooked Mujhe bhi bohot hua hai Semi-cooked pyaar Woh picturon ki tarah aahein bharna Aur fantasize karna Ki agar tum mujhe date karte toh kaisa hota Tum ye kehte, main uss baat par khoob hasti Hum sex karte, hum cuddle karte Mixed with so many kisses Wo semi-cooked pyaar Jo har call par sochta hai Ki tum meri aawaaz sun-ne ka bahana kar rahe ho Aur wo jo kehta hai Ki tum picture ke wo hero ho Jise abhi tak pata hee nahi hai Ki use heroine se pyaar ho chuka hai Wo semi-cooked pyaar jo gas par chadhaa toh Kuch aag bhi jali thi shayad Dheemi si khushboo mujhe aayi Shayad tumhe bhi aayi thi Warna hum dono hee Naak uthaae kyun hote bhala Logon se bhare iss kamre mein? Semi-cooked pyaar Mehak bhi aati hai Bhoonk bhi lagti hai Par khaali paet Khaali dil Hee sona padta hai
Cat kiss Forever eluding and often angry For leaving him alone Sometimes when I embrace him in a hug He claws to run away And sometimes he stays Looks into my eyes And blinks oh so slowly The book on cat behaviour says He's offering me a kiss. It is easy, so easy To know his kind of love But with humans I want Only one kind of love.